Worst case

Last I checked, advertising is supposed to stimulate a consumer's desire for whatever it is that you're selling. Who knows what the Halifax (Nova Scotia) Downtown Business Commission is thinking. But it's funny.

And see where "Chinstrap" and the "Lip Quilt" fall in the rankings of the best men's facial hair, from top to bottom.

"Ask five economists and you'll get five different answers -- six if one went to Harvard." -- Edgar Fiedler

Lone wolf

Uncomfortable man caught seeing "50 Shades Of Grey" seems more like he's walking out of a peep show.

And unrelated, the nihilism of Werner Herzog's thoughts, presented as a series of inspirational posters.

"Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it." - P. J. O'Rourke

Reverse psychology

Finally accepting the facts about YouTube viewers, Geico makes you an ad you can't refuse.

"Genius is eternal patience." -- Michelangelo

Soporific

Cat with a touch of sleep apnea snores a pillow into submission, likely keeping any bedmates wide awake.

And these hypnotic geometric GIFs probably wouldn't be of much help fighting that battle.

"Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone." -- Anthony Burgess

Don't fear the retriever

Don't fear the (Golden) Retriever. An amusing Vine with enough cowbell, maybe(?).

"Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age." -- Jeanne Moreau

A little help from my friends

Nifty demonstration by "Physics Girl" of how to make a golf ball bounce 8X higher than its drop point and how this relates to supernovas, of all things.

"All the problems of the world could be settled easily if men were only willing to think. The trouble is that men very often resort to all sorts of devices in order not to think, because thinking is such hard work." -- Thomas J. Watson

Striptese

What happens if you adhere Bach's "Crab Canon", a musical sequence designed to be played played front to back and back to front, on a looping Möbius strip? Genius.

And "Free Strips of Paper" is but one in this list of amusing fliers posted on a bulletin board near you.

"Music is the strongest form of magic." -- Marilyn Manson

Distant shores

Oddball video unveils a new (for me, anyway) form of internet weirdness, replete with much messy gunge. Go ahead, keep watching and thinking it'll make sense...

"A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water." -- Carl Reiner

Clouded judgment

Not a bad morning commute, just 1,768 feet. Straight up. I suppose there are worse jobs.

"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed." -- George Burns

Art rustler

Drone flies over cattle while ranchers try their hand at Cow Art with the feed truck.

And the nifty alleged features of the supposedly (but not really) forthcoming Apple Car.

"My cow is not pretty, but it is pretty to me." -- David Lynch

Remakes

Just in time for the Oscars, check out "Scenes You've Seen", the Award Winners Edition, where you can try to guess the Oscar-winning movies from clips recreated using stock footage. (The original with 14 classic movies might be a little easier.)

And Name that Beep lets you try your luck at matching sounds to gadgets.

"The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder." -- Alfred Hitchcock

Unsung hero

Holy mother of pearl -- imagine the practice that must have gone into playing John Coltrane's "Blue Train" note for note on a recorder, clearly the most underrated member of the woodwind family.

"Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater." -- Albert Einstein

Just win, baby

This Kickstarter idea isn't weird or anything -- a fake-baby booze bottle (with built-in koozie) that makes you look like just another responsible parent at tailgaters, weddings, church socials, etc.

"It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it." -- W. C. Fields

Pig in a poke

There's something not kosher about this sausage-maker... is this gag in poor taste? (Thanks Bomser)

"When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper." -- Andy Rooney

Go with the flow

Survey one of the world's most beautiful cities Barcelona in flow-motion via this stunning short film hyperlapse.

"Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like." -- Lao Tzu

4D Friends

Simultaneously experience every episode of the sitcom "Friends" Season 1 on a single little screen. Potential timesaver or hallucinogen replacement.

"Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight?" -- Al Boliska

Wheelie zen

Indian guru gets in the zone performing life-risking yoga poses while riding a motorcycle.

"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time." -- John Lubbock

Fruit loop

Entertaining Swedish magician Carl-Einar Häckner provides a few-minute diversion perpetrating horrible acts on a banana.

"Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus." -- Alexander Graham Bell